What is Love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more.

Discussion in 'Every Day Debating' started by Silvermune, Mar 24, 2012.

  1. Gayle Miller

    Gayle Miller New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2012
    Messages:
    57
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Scotland
    Ratings:
    +1 / 0 / -0
    Lust is often mistaken for love. The "falling in love" is purely a reaction in order to reproduce/mate and find a partner that will stick around to raise the offspring. When no offspring is on the cards, the brain shuts off those feelings and you start to look around for more suitable partners. The length of time can vary but generally three months is all it needs. This probably explains why people start going back to their usual bad habits after that time.
    Love is a subtle feeling that doesn't need a mating response. It develops from a bond that is created from memories and experiences shared. This is why people in love will often say that their partner is their best friend. It's effortless because you both have a mutual respect for each others happiness and welfare.
    You can be in love with more than one person because of these factors but who you choose to partner up with takes into account the lust factor, who can provide the best lifestyle, how safe you feel with them and the strength of the bond.
    I would say that I have never been in love, though I have been in lust many times.
     
  2. Foinikas

    Foinikas Playing backgammon!

    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2005
    Messages:
    7,802
    Likes Received:
    96
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    VDNH Station,Moscow
    Ratings:
    +97 / 0 / -0
  3. Padmé

    Padmé Mrs Cascador

    Joined:
    Aug 14, 2004
    Messages:
    20,382
    Likes Received:
    205
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Depends
    Ratings:
    +205 / 0 / -0
    Way to break the mood, Foin lol You are hereby dubbed the Grinch of Love! :p
     
  4. Foinikas

    Foinikas Playing backgammon!

    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2005
    Messages:
    7,802
    Likes Received:
    96
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    VDNH Station,Moscow
    Ratings:
    +97 / 0 / -0
    Loooool!
     
  5. Taliesyn

    Taliesyn It's a feral reality out there, kids.

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2012
    Messages:
    6,350
    Likes Received:
    254
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Ratings:
    +423 / 2 / -0
    Love is far more than feelings or chemical reactions. I know that much at least.

    Love is a choice.

    Love is choosing to share yourself with another specific person in that intimate kind of way that you would with no other. And by sharing, I don't only mean your personal space or finances, but also your time and energy. In short, you're willing to put yourself on the line for that person - emotionally and in every other way - with no guarantee that they'll do the same.

    That's love right there.
     
  6. JNK

    JNK King of tards

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2012
    Messages:
    5,909
    Likes Received:
    90
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Bern, Switzerland
    Ratings:
    +138 / 4 / -2
    love is pain....
     
  7. Gayle Miller

    Gayle Miller New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2012
    Messages:
    57
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    Scotland
    Ratings:
    +1 / 0 / -0
    That goes back to the bond that is created from shared memories and experiences. There is no guarantee that the other person will have as strong a bond or view the memories and experiences the same way which is why the other factors come into play. The reason you invest your time and energy is because you want more of those memories and experiences, which in turn strengthens the bond and your desire to see them happy. It's a simple case of reinforced feel good responses to the object of that love, whether it be a person, music, food etc.
     
  8. S.J. Faerlind

    S.J. Faerlind Flashlight Shadowhunter

    Joined:
    May 29, 2012
    Messages:
    5,642
    Likes Received:
    191
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Canada
    Ratings:
    +298 / 2 / -1
    I agree with Firiath... there are all different kinds of love and maybe all of us don't get to experience all of them. There's the love you have for a soul-mate/partner/spouse (whatever you want to call them), which is what I assume Silvermune was asking about in his original post. There's also the love people have for their friends, their children / family, their country, their community, their pets, their world and for their fellow human beings whether they know them or not.

    I agree with Gayle that with respect to partners/soul-mates/spouses, true love is more than just attraction. You have to be friends too and have that friendship deepen over time. At my age I've seen a lot of friends and relatives get divorced or leave their partners because they grew apart rather than growing closer together. They lost their friendship somewhere along the way or maybe they never had it to begin with, I don't know. If a couple can keep that friendship through all the trials life throws at them, I think that love follows without too much effort.
     
  9. JNK

    JNK King of tards

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2012
    Messages:
    5,909
    Likes Received:
    90
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Bern, Switzerland
    Ratings:
    +138 / 4 / -2
    I agree with jnk... love is crap!
     
  10. S.J. Faerlind

    S.J. Faerlind Flashlight Shadowhunter

    Joined:
    May 29, 2012
    Messages:
    5,642
    Likes Received:
    191
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Canada
    Ratings:
    +298 / 2 / -1
    lmao....cynic! ;)
    I shoulda known better than to post anything in here....lol
     
  11. JNK

    JNK King of tards

    Joined:
    Aug 17, 2012
    Messages:
    5,909
    Likes Received:
    90
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Bern, Switzerland
    Ratings:
    +138 / 4 / -2
    I agree with SJ, she shoulda ;)

    I also agree with jnk: love stinks!
     
  12. Taliesyn

    Taliesyn It's a feral reality out there, kids.

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2012
    Messages:
    6,350
    Likes Received:
    254
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Ratings:
    +423 / 2 / -0
  13. Dreamscaper

    Dreamscaper Royal Hamster Wrangler

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2009
    Messages:
    1,962
    Likes Received:
    134
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Florida
    Ratings:
    +249 / 3 / -0
    Depends entirely on the kind of love you are speaking of.
    Early on love is an absolute willingness to be around someone, to serve them in any capacity, to ensure their well being even at the cost of your own, a deep emotional attachment where the most frightening thing in the world is losing them, a deep loyalty and committment.

    I've never gotten beyond that stage due to never actually finding someone that gave a rat's arse about me and viewed me as a source of free food, so as far as I know that's just puppy love or it could last forever. It also will get you manipulated and comes with a deep sense of failure and pain if the other person doesn't care for you back or uses you. There's a reason I use my head over my heart nowadays, I swear my heart is a masochist.
     
  14. Kakashi

    Kakashi The Fighters Guide House Member

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2005
    Messages:
    15,018
    Likes Received:
    306
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Location:
    In the hearts and minds of us all
    Ratings:
    +306 / 0 / -0
    Love doesn't exist. That's the answer.
     
  15. S.J. Faerlind

    S.J. Faerlind Flashlight Shadowhunter

    Joined:
    May 29, 2012
    Messages:
    5,642
    Likes Received:
    191
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Location:
    Canada
    Ratings:
    +298 / 2 / -1