Unknown Title At This Point

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by BBallForLife, Jul 6, 2006.

  1. BBallForLife

    BBallForLife New Member

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    Okay, Ithink that I'm going to quit the idea of The Mercenary, I didn't really like it, but have no fear. Here is another story (hopefully better) that I completely made up. This is dedicated to King Eduardo and my other faithful fans. :)
     
  2. Wing Rider

    Wing Rider Psychotic Cybernetica

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    Where is it?...it hasn't appeared on my screen.
     
  3. Carline of Crydee

    Carline of Crydee Beyond eternity

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    Yes where is it? I'd like to read it :)
     
  4. Wing Rider

    Wing Rider Psychotic Cybernetica

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    Nothing has appeared for ten days...
     
  5. Carline of Crydee

    Carline of Crydee Beyond eternity

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    He must've abandoned us... *starts crying*
     
  6. Wing Rider

    Wing Rider Psychotic Cybernetica

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    Here, have a tissue...
     
  7. Carline of Crydee

    Carline of Crydee Beyond eternity

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    Thank you..

    (Maybe he's just on holiday, but... whatever! :D)
     
  8. BBallForLife

    BBallForLife New Member

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    Sorry guys... I'm on vacation at the beach and my computer totally crashed. We just ordered a new computer... hope to start soon!
     
  9. Carline of Crydee

    Carline of Crydee Beyond eternity

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    Ha I knew you wouldn't have left us :D
    The beach nice??
     
  10. Wing Rider

    Wing Rider Psychotic Cybernetica

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    I'm going on holiday on soon, too...haha on Saturday :D
     
  11. Carline of Crydee

    Carline of Crydee Beyond eternity

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    Oh where are you going?
     
  12. Wing Rider

    Wing Rider Psychotic Cybernetica

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    Somewhere in Lancashire, just on the border. Near to North Yorkshire.
    (for those who are puzzled, that's mostly Northern England) Staying there a week, I believe.
    Is this story going to come on yet?
     
  13. BBallForLife

    BBallForLife New Member

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    As soon as I get to stop typing on my uncle's laptop that has no word and I get my new computer. :)

    By the way... THE BEACH IS AWESOME. I unfortunately leave on Saturday. :(

    I'll start typing again soon!
     
  14. Wing Rider

    Wing Rider Psychotic Cybernetica

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    Hmmm...I've been away for a week and when I came back there was still no progress. :D
     
  15. BBallForLife

    BBallForLife New Member

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    Don't worry guys. My new computer is up and running. Expect an update soon.
     
  16. BBallForLife

    BBallForLife New Member

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    I've thought of a title for the story...The Lost Art. I'm typing chapter 1 right now.
     
  17. BBallForLife

    BBallForLife New Member

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    The Lost Art

    Chapter 1: Thoughts of Revenge


    Gaindrick sat atop his pure black wyvern, and stared calmly at the destruction below. He had long black hair that curved down his back to about his waist. He had a hooked nose and bright green, intellectual eyes. He had on a full suit of purple armor with highlights of black. A greatsword longer than he was tall was strapped to his back. Gaindrick was on top of a cliff overlooking the once town of Luman. Now all that remained was charred rubble and mountains of dead bodies.

    Luman had been a small town. They were known for farming, but surprisingly, many inns and taverns littered the cluttered streets. The town sat in a cluster of hills with a small band of mountains to the east. A lake bordered the town to the south, creating another trade for the citizens.

    Gaindrick smiled. The killing had been fun, and best of all, the girl was in his captivity. He had only lost thirteen men, a fairly large number for a farming village, but some of the villagers did know how to fight. It was said a summoner lived in the village, but no beasts had been seen on the battlefield. Nevertheless, no survivors remained, so when the king’s men came searching, bandits would be blamed, not royalty from another country.

    “Lord Gaindrick,” said one of the soldiers. He had on black armor, Gaindrick’s royal guard. He carried a spear. “The girl is on her way up right now.”

    “Thank you,” replied Gaindrick, “that will be all.” Gaindrick climbed down from his wyvern. This girl meant everything. If the prophecies were true, this girl meant the key to the lost art of magic, which had been forgotten back in the third age. Gaindrick had spent nearly his entire life devoted to finding this one simple girl. Gaindrick took off his helmet as the girl approached.

    As Gaindrick thought, this was the girl. Bright red hair. Mark of a blade on both palms. Purple eyes. “Do you know who you are girl?”

    The girl looked at him through tear streaked, defiant eyes. “Your worst nightmare,” she said spatting at his feet. She mumbled arcane words and a wall of fire formed, killing the two guards around her. She started to say something else, but was cut short as Gaindrick seized her with one hand. With the other, he smacked her across the face before she could finish the incantation. The force of the blow knocked her out.

    “This is the girl,” shouted Gaindrick, “the girl that thirteen of your fellow soldiers died today to capture. This is the key to magic!”

    Cheers erupted from the men in the ruins of Luman who were busy finding and gathering the dead bodies. Men in soldiers colors (purple), general’s colors (dark blue), and even some of Gaindrick’s personal guards (black). Little did any of them know, that another set of ears heard the cry of triumph.
    * * *

    Samuel Avrie crouched behind a destroyed wagon. A bow was strung on his back. A sword was attached to his waist by a scabbard, but he had no idea how to use it. It had been a possession of his late father, Rolf Avrie. His real weapon, the quarterstaff, was held in his hands. He had long, sandy-colored hair which fell just below his ears. He had blue eyes and was fairly tall. His once innocent face was now hard from the death he had seen today.

    * * *

    Today had started out like any other. Samuel had gotten up at the crack of dawn, and had gone out to the fields to plow the land. That had saved him. It was the mayor’s birthday today, so no other people were working, but Samuel was ambitious. He wanted to shine in his father’s eyes like no other, even more than his older brother who had joined the king’s royal army. Luman lay in the country of Allion, the smallest and weakest of all other countries in the world. They were peace loving farmers, not battle loving mongrels, but Rolf Avrie was from Salor, the largest military power. Even if the army of Allion were far from Salor’s strength, it brought Rolf joy just to see his son in the army. Samuel began working and worked for nearly three hours. He stopped for a water break, and saw a welcome face, Avisha’s. Avisha was his best friend, but Samuel wished it were more than that. Rumors were that Avisha felt the same way, but for now, they were just friends. Avisha had long red hair, not native to the brown and blonde hair of these parts. More strange were her purple eyes. Avisha had no parents. She lived with an aging widow.

    “Good day Samuel!” shouted Avisha. She was roughly one hundred yards away, and was closing in. Suddenly, a shadow began to grow on top of her. Samuel looked to the sky. “Avisha, look out!” screamed Samuel.

    Directly above Avisha, a red wyvern was swooping down. Avisha dived, and made it beneath the wyvern’s stretching claws. The wyvern shrieked and flew off. Samuel sprinted to Avisha and grabbed her. “Come on. We have to hurry!” He grabbed her hand and sped off. They raced to Luman as fast as possible. More shadows grouped over them, but luckily, the citizens had left their plows and other equipment out which made perfect hiding places. Unfortunately, their fears were confirmed.

    Luman was on fire! Soldiers in purple, dark blue, and black armor were rushing around killing groups of innocent villagers. “The colors of Grammore!” shrieked Avisha.

    “Here,” said Samuel, “we’ll split here. You go to your house; I’ll go to mine. Meet at the Weeping Hare tavern in fifteen minutes. Agreed?”

    Avisha nodded her head in approval then sped off towards the lake. Her home was right on the shore. Samuel watched for a while to make sure she was okay, then rushed to his house which was in the middle of Luman. He dodged soldiers along the way, and even saw some of his best friends being slaughtered, but he managed to make it home. He rushed in the front door. Inside, a soldier in black armor was cleaning off his blade on the clothing of his little sister. The rest of his family was scattered along the ground except for his father, who was nowhere to be seen. The soldier turned around and noticed Samuel. “Hello boy. Care to join your family. I promise to make it quick.”

    Samuel grabbed his quarterstaff (which was lying on a stand next to the doorway) and advanced on the soldier.

    “Oh. So the little boy has some toys. Well battles for adults kid,” said the soldier as he swung the blade towards Samuel. Samuel blocked it. It was a good thing that he had been given a metal quarterstaff for his fifteenth birthday, otherwise his weapon would have just been sliced in two. Samuel brought the staff up under the soldier and knocked him off of his feet. Samuel stepped next to the soldier and prepared to deal the final blow. The soldier had been feigning defeat however. He grabbed Samuel and knocked him down. The soldier raised his blade. Samuel saw his life flash before his eyes as the soldier’s muscles clenched to cleanly take off Samuel’s head… then before Samuel knew it, the soldier was lying on his back with a crossbow bolt in the neck.

    “There you are Samuel! I’ve been looking all over for you,” came the voice of Rolf Avrie. Only then did Rolf notice the bodies of Rolf’s two daughters and one other son lying dead on the ground. Rolf’s wife had died giving birth to Sara, the youngest of the family, only eight years old. “My God! Samuel, take your bow, quarterstaff, and some supplies, and get out of here!”

    “But father, what about you?”

    “I have some revenge to get!” After saying this, Rolf rushed out of the home with his sword out.

    Samuel collected the necessities, and left, saying goodbye to his family forever.

    * * *

    Now Samuel was out for revenge. His family, his home, his life had been stolen from him. At least Avisha was alive. Now Samuel knew what he must do. Without flinching, Samuel drew back his bowstring and killed his first two men fast; two guards who had been standing close. “Farewell father,” Samuel said looking at the body of his father next to him, then putting the bow back on his back, he sprinted to the next cover.

    * * *

    Gaindrick climbed back onto his black wyvern. “Guards, assemble the troops. We are moving out and returning home.” Draping the body of Avisha across his ride, Gaindrick took off.

    * * *

    Samuel had taken out another five since his first two. He now had a horse from one of the soldiers he had killed. Samuel had heard the command to move out. Taking his horse, he left before the soldiers of Grammore did. He knew the forest that they were about to go through well. In his mind, he began to think of a plan.
     
    Last edited: Aug 13, 2006
  18. Borael

    Borael Prophet of Arka

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    This looks good so far, looking forword to more! Only think thing that I noticed wore a couple minor mistakes but nothing youd miss if you read back through it.
     
  19. BBallForLife

    BBallForLife New Member

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    I made the font bigger because it's easier to read.
     
  20. Wing Rider

    Wing Rider Psychotic Cybernetica

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    It was much easier to read, maybe I should change the font size on my stuff (except I couldn't fit as much text on the page). :D
    The story is really good so far, I'm glad to see that it's a huge step up form your mercenary story, also with magic in it too. I hope you post some more chapters soon.
     
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