more women jokes.

Discussion in 'Joke Board' started by AlphaAlex, May 4, 2009.

  1. AlphaAlex

    AlphaAlex Official Forum Nuisance

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    How many men does it take to open a beer?
    None. It should be opened when she brings it.

    Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
    Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.

    Why do women have smaller feet than men?
    It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

    How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
    When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me....'

    How do you fix a woman's watch?
    You don't. There is a clock on the oven.

    If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
    The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

    Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
    It's called a Wedding Cake.

    Why do men die before their wives?
    They want to.

    Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
     
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  2. Killbot608

    Killbot608 prototype killing machine

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    LAWL! that is all.
     
  3. Raff the Sweetling

    Raff the Sweetling Threadkiller

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    Ha! Someone had to say It!

    Why haven't any women ever gone to the moon?
    It doesn't need cleaning yet

    What do you call a woman with two brain cells?
    Pregnant.

    What is the difference between a battery and a woman?
    A battery has a positive side.

    Why do women get married in white?
    So they match the kitchen appliances!
     
  4. Pyrofyre

    Pyrofyre From the ashes, I rise

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    >.<.... Grr....

    God made men, Then had a better Idea :D *sticks out tounge*
     
  5. Killbot608

    Killbot608 prototype killing machine

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    its all in the name o fun pyro. the modern man does almost as much housework as women, it'll either balance out or ther'll be some role reversal.
     
  6. Killbot608

    Killbot608 prototype killing machine

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  7. Pyrofyre

    Pyrofyre From the ashes, I rise

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    ...Sexist ASS!
     
  8. Pyrofyre

    Pyrofyre From the ashes, I rise

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    I should report him xD (jk)
     
  9. Killbot608

    Killbot608 prototype killing machine

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    aw. i jest, i <3 u really :D
     
  10. RayCaptain

    RayCaptain Purveyor of High Culture, Aristocrat of the Soul

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    that video is faved now...
     
  11. aury

    aury former doubleposter

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    why dont womwn need a drivers liscense?
    because there is no road btetween the bedroom and the kitchen

    what do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?
    nothing. youve already told her twice.


    these jokes are all so old
     
  12. aury

    aury former doubleposter

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    why dont womwn need a drivers liscense?
    because there is no road btetween the bedroom and the kitchen

    what do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?
    nothing. youve already told her twice.


    these jokes are all so old
     
  13. Killbot608

    Killbot608 prototype killing machine

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    u love dp dont u aury? :D
     
  14. Pyrofyre

    Pyrofyre From the ashes, I rise

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    Jest?
     
  15. aury

    aury former doubleposter

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    dp? *feels dejavu*

    EW its all in good fun. to jest is to joke. its just@like blonde jokes. funny haha
     
  16. aury

    aury former doubleposter

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    dp? *feels dejavu*

    pyro its all in good fun. to jest is to joke. its just@like blonde jokes. funny haha


    EDIT: digimon paraphanalia right? uh no
     
    Last edited: May 4, 2009
  17. Pyrofyre

    Pyrofyre From the ashes, I rise

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    hehe, how does a blonde kill a fish?
    Drowns it!

    How does a blonde kill a bird?
    Throws it off a cliff!
     
  18. Lord Yuan

    Lord Yuan Death-Thousand+

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    Wanna hear a joke?
     
  19. RayCaptain

    RayCaptain Purveyor of High Culture, Aristocrat of the Soul

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    Women's Rights
     
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  20. AlphaAlex

    AlphaAlex Official Forum Nuisance

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    hahahahaaa.. *can see ray being slaughtered*