Feedback: Needle "story"

Discussion in 'A Song of Ice and Fire' started by CB Swords, Sep 15, 2008.

  1. CB Swords

    CB Swords Forum Administrator

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    This would be the text for the Certificate of Authenticity to be included with Needle. Looking for feedback on it, on accuracy etc.

     
  2. Overread

    Overread Wolfing it up! Staff Member

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    needs a spoier warning ;)
     
  3. CB Swords

    CB Swords Forum Administrator

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    Hrmm...

    With Longclaw we could fill 2 paragraphs because the sword has history, with Needle it has no history so we have to use story. I guess perhaps maybe just limit it to AGOT stuff?
     
  4. Overread

    Overread Wolfing it up! Staff Member

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    True its a sword making its history now more than one with a past to it - a difficult line to walk I think since to reduce it to only AGOT is to limit what material you have to work with (though you could try adding more about the Arya as a distraction) whilst going and adding a lot more is a little bit too revealing - I think announcing that they two are reunited is fine since its revealing, but not telling, whilst the Faceless Men part its a bit more revealing to newer readers of the series
     
  5. Ilaelin

    Ilaelin The Mother of Dragons

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    Omg...omg...omg you're making a Needle! I can't wait to see it! Like I said in the Longclaw post my little Arya needs a Needle! If it is only to hang on her wall! ;) As for the certificate it does need a little something more, arrgh, I'm just having a brain spasm right now and can't think. Too excited of the announcement in general! :D
     
  6. CB Swords

    CB Swords Forum Administrator

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    The certificate will have more. Standard boilerplate about the edition & ASOIAF, GRRM's signature, a few images. But it all centers around a history of the blade.
     
  7. LyannaWolfBlood

    LyannaWolfBlood Ella Dictadora

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    Yeah, I agree that there's too much story. I'd talk more about the style of sword and how it's used personally. Cool idea though! :D
     
  8. CB Swords

    CB Swords Forum Administrator

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    Shorter but less spoilers certainly.
     
  9. Maester Joergensen

    Maester Joergensen New Member

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    I love the puns about "needlework" in the books. You should definetely use that.
    But in the first section you should really consider using shorter sentences.
    It is kind of hard to read.

    Do you really have to care about spoilers? You have to be quite a fan to purchase such a sword. You probably read the books.
     
  10. CB Swords

    CB Swords Forum Administrator

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    I'm not so worried about spoiling the first book, but I don't want to spoil the later ones.

    We managed to fill up the COA anyways.
     
  11. Overread

    Overread Wolfing it up! Staff Member

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    dosn't mean you've read through them all though ;)