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Professor Nick Cutter.
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Brother's Woe
Thwack. Jacob dodged swiftly before a punch, set for him, swung into the wall. He saw it leave a faintly cracked impression, before the second fist set it's target and aimed for his face like the first. With all the strength he could muster, he caught the clenched blow in his hand to prevent it from reaching him, though this was not a good idea. His brother struggled for a moment, and then with the free hand allowed himself to swipe rapidly for Jacob's eye, causing instant damage. Jacob let go, and buckling against the wall, fell to the ground, groaning in agony and trying to tend to the bloody wound scarred across his face. It stung with unimaginable wrath.
"For the god's sake Angus!" He shouted, as the sight in his right eye began to blur, "I was trying to help her! The arrow pierced her heart- she couldn't have survived for any longer than she did do, and she held out for a good hour after impact with my help. You should've been there when you had the chance!" He tried to get up to steady himself, but it was done with great difficulty. "You knew where I was- fighting to save everyone else when the scout line fell! She may have been injured, Jacob, but if I had run away like the other cowards did, I'd shame all of my family. That said, I don't see why I bothered! You were posted here to tend to the sick, and you failed with the first chance you got!" "Failed? Failed! Damn your ignorant mind Angus! I can heal the wounded, I can't bring people back from certain death! Plus you're blaming me for what the enemy did to her!" Angus paused. "You might have done what you claim you could do, but it wasn't good enough, was it? What about me raising you from ten winters onwards, and guiding you all this time? A job I've done for ten winters since of my own life, when I should've been rid of you sooner!" he interrogated. With a degree of sarcasm, Jacob replied "Oh, ten years Angus? Sorry for being such a bloody burden! I guess comparing your wife's final moments of trying to make sure she didn't choke up too much of her own blood in her final minutes is near exactly the same as taking care of an orphaned child that knew no better! You might as well, have left me in the damp back gutters- otherwise I'd be dead too!" "You just don't get it do you? You're the reason Niyla is dead! How am I supposed to keep a brother's respect to his brother when there is nothing there to respect in the first place! You've taken away the woman I loved and married..." Jacob interrupted "Well if I'm so damned useless, I don't need you tell me every remaining day hence. Go ahead- keep thinking it was me that let you're wife go, but tonight you've lost two of you're most beloved; Niyla and me. Maybe then you'll see how she looked at me in her final seconds with only an expression of pity and longing that her love Angus might take the time to drop his sword once to say goodbye as she closed her blue eyes!" "No more! No more. Leave, if that is your choice. Just go..." he paused, as if something was on the tip of his tongue, "No...just go, Jacob". Without a further exclamation between the two brothers, Jacob walked without a glance towards a now tearful Angus. He stepped outside the creaking door into the pouring rain, and walked across the muddy ground that the dirt path had become, straight into the ancient oak forests of which he knew well. Finding a mossy tree stump, he sat with great intensity, and clutched his pounding head sobbingly as the tears poured from at least one pain-felt red eye.
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![]() And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed
They say it's my fault but I want her so much. Last edited by Wolf; 03-05-2007 at 01:51 PM. |
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#2 |
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I am a Fashion Statement
Noble
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: The Drunken Isle
Posts: 3,215
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Re: Brother's Woe
that was good...
![]() may i ask... is it just this, or is there a story behind it??? ![]() im sure ive told you before... you've got some talent!!! keep it up! ![]()
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My ass is only ignorant cause of the shit it has to deal with everyday, it doesn't know any better - Plish |
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#3 |
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Professor Nick Cutter.
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Re: Brother's Woe
Thanks WL- I was wondering whether to continue it or not, as the story was invented on a whim, with just an idea in mind that keeps developing. (So yes there will be more of it shortly!)
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![]() And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed
They say it's my fault but I want her so much. |
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#4 |
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Ranger
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 182
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Re: Brother's Woe
Not bad. I liked it. Just like Warlock Lord's question, does it have a main story line?
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I'm so sexy, I create global warming. |
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#5 |
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Fair Play
TFF Nobility
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Within your hopes and dreams
Posts: 16,978
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Re: Brother's Woe
Just noticed this now, it's really good, your style is very unique, the dialog flows beautifully which really helps the presentation as a whole. Looking forward to reading more.
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Forum husband of Sevi/King of the Fellowship/Founding Member of Samurai Onions Inc. Protect This Body |
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